Every time I come to orlando, I’m struck by the mundane, funny differences i notice between it and providence, from the Hummers that fill the road here (i didn’t realize people still drove hummers either!) to the predominance of old people (that stereotype is true, folks) to the way the sun always seems to be trying to kill you with its death rays.
below are some of the smallest, best, weirdest, or most classic differences that have stood out to me the last few days…
in providence, you share the sidewalks with pedestrians, generally college students, runners and strollers, or people walking to and from brunch. In Orlando, you share the sidewalks with squirrels and lizards; no humans walk on sidewalks. why would you do that when you have a car?
in providence, driving to dinner 20 minutes away wouldn’t just take you out of your town, it might just take you out of the state. In orlando, driving 20 minutes away for dinner is just what you have to do to get to your favorite restaurant.
in providence in the fall, when night falls, the cold rushes back in like its been waiting all damn day to settle in. in orlando in the fall, when night falls, the warm humid air hugs the ground like it’s its BEST FRIEND, and the only time you get any relief from the heat is that one hour right around sunrise when it’s light enough and cool enough and non-humid enough to run carrying only one water bottle with you instead of two.
in providence you see a lake in the summer and you’re like, A LAKE! LET’S GET IN! It’ll be cold but it’ll also be awesome and then we can sun out on that rock over there! In orlando you see a lake and you’re like, omigod, did you hear about that tourist lady that got eaten by the alligator in that lake last week? she didn’t run in a zigzag.
In providence, you wear a jacket when you’re outside. In orlando, the outside is trying to kill you with heat, and the inside is where air conditioners are jacked up so high all the time, so you end up wearing a fleece indoors so you don’t freeze to death.
in providence, you hear fireworks and you think, god damn those kids still have new hampshire fireworks from july — they are going to blow their hands off! In orlando, you hear the scheduled nightly fireworks, and you thank disney for helping you keep time.